We ALL do it.
We worry, we fret, we over-think, we stress (out), we have anxiety, we go nuts, we work ourselves up, we plead temporary insanity … over something that hasn’t even happened yet (or may never happen).
We sweat, we pull our hair out, we scratch our skin incessantly … we play out scenario, after scenario, after scenario … What if I did this? What if this happened? How do I make this work? When? Where? Who? If… But…
We develop weird “ticks” that become habits long after the anxiety of our present stress has dissipated.
Before you dive head-long into the subject of your current energy’s focus — take a step back.
Is this endeavor truly worth my time?
Do I need to buy into the stereotype that stress is the only way to accomplish this task (or any task) or respond to this relationship issue? For example: If I’m not feeling stressed, I’m not accomplishing anything and this isn’t working because my hair hasn’t turned gray because my nervous system isn’t fried.
I know many people who function this way. They have to have a high anxiety level to feel like they are functioning and getting work done. They have to keep themselves so busy that they don’t have time to breathe until their head hits the pillow and they breathe because its automatic.
My question to them is this: What are you hiding from? — (because, seriously, no one has that much to prove) — What are you scared of catching up with you if you stop or slow down long enough for it to find you?
You need to face your demons.
I use this technique a lot: Visualize yourself in the situation. Feel yourself in it. — How does it feel? Does it bring you joy (even with the hard work that needs to be done)? Would you do this if you didn’t have to?
Honestly listen to yourself. Honestly acknowledge what you are feeling — That feeling will not lie to you. That feeling is what you are trying to hide from or what you are trying to run to. Act accordingly to the feeling of what that situation instills within you — feel when to jump in or when to walk away, and do it.
Even if you have to do a task you don’t want to because of work or some other obligation — STOP stressing over it, DO it, and do it to the very best of your abilities.
The energy you spend thinking and stressing about doing something is more energy wasted than it would take to actually accomplish the task.
Keep a clear and level head about you. Take responsibility for your life. Step up. Do what needs to be done.
I assure you life will flow more smoothly and your relationships will be better for it.